ADAM: For this post on Hungarian food, I’m just going to cut straight to the Cabbage Strudel. We had it, and it was amazing. In fact, we partially chose our restaurant—Andre’s Cafe in the part of Manhattan’s Upper East Side formerly known as Little Hungary—because of a New York Times article penned by Nora Ephron, in which she chronicles her obsession with Cabbage Strudel and how Andre’s was the only restaurant where she was able to find it made correctly/awesomely. 
LAURA: I was doubtful of Ephron’s claims—1100 words gushing about a pastry-wrapped vegetable that I associate with stimulating bowel movements—but she was as spot-on about the strudel as she was about Deep Throat’s identity. When it came out, our noses sensed “eggroll,” but our mouths thought otherwise. It was unexpectedly sweet and so rich with butter, each bite was like getting assaulted by a milkmaid. I was convinced the cabbage was loaded with nutmeg or cinnamon or some other saccharine ingredient, but our server said that salt and peppering were the only seasonings.
ADAM: Next came the soups—specifically a cauliflower and a beef goulash—because we’d read soup was a hearty staple of traditional Hungarian lunches, which is their biggest meal of the day. Unfortunately, the soups we got were fairly thin and generally tasteless. Let’s pretend they never happened and move on to our entrees. 
LAURA: I stayed on the roughage train and ordered the stuffed cabbage, which was more savory than the strudel but just as delicious. A mixture of pork and rice was crammed into a pocket of cabbage leaves and then smothered with sauerkraut and served with a side sour cream. It was reminiscent of a bratwurst without the bun, so if this were 1997, Dr. Atkins would be shoving it into your fat face.
ADAM: I had a hearty and tasty Chicken Paprikas with Nokedli, which is essentially a paprika-seasoned stewed chicken served with a lump of spatzle. Paprikas are staple Hungarian dishes, made by cooking meat with fat, onions, paprika and sour cream. And let’s note: The spice paprika isn’t always hot, it can also be sweet, as it was here. These days, paprika is thought of as the Hungary’s signature spice, but it actually wasn’t around till the 16th century when the Turks brought it to over, along with coffee and the aforementioned stuffed cabbage. Unfortunately, the Turks also brought over their army and used it to occupy Hungary for 150 years. So, you know…trade-offs.
LAURA: Dessert was the Dobos Torte (below), a layered vanilla cake with chocolate buttercream filling. What sets it apart from the Betty Crocker variety is a hardened caramel top, the invention of József Dobos, torte creator and the Hungarian Idol of confections during the late 1800s. The caramel topping kept the cake from drying out and put Dobos on the map for creating a longer-lasting pastry. Then Twinkies were invented, proved their shelf-life of 64 years or whatever, and everyone forgot about Dobos.
ADAM: We also fought over two tasty Palatschinkes, aka Hungarian crepes, one of which was filled with chocolate and one with raisins and cheese. Palatschinkes can also be filled with savories and served as a main dish. For example, my Chicken Paprikas can also be ordered wrapped in a crepe. I’m dubbing that dish Sauced Chicks in a Blanket.
LAURA: Overall, the meal was amazing. It certainly left me Hungary for more!
ADAM: Yeah, I’d ask you to keep going back there, but I don’t want to be a Budapest!
LAURA: What do you call an Eastern European with a big penis? Ready: A Hung-Aryan!
ADAM: Babe, that has nothing to do with our meal. But…high-five!
Eats Deets
Andre’s Café
1631 2nd Avenue, Upper East Side
(212) 327-1105
